Last Friday, Boot had football practice until 6, so his dad brought him late. We just had a quiet evening in. I had a horrible time cooking, just wasn't at all on my game. The weird thing is that I made 2 beautiful loaves of Cuban bread and a gorgeous quartet of chocolate espresso soufflés with no problem whatsoever. But, when it came to the no-brainer things, foods I either make all the time or should be able to make with ease, it was a complete disaster! Thank goodness I bought pre-seasoned Cuban-style black beans from Trader Joe's because I probably would have screwed those up, too. I make them all the time, but I know I would have blown it. The dinner I attempted to make was bistec empanizado (but I bought the steak too thick and couldn't pound it as thin as it needed to be...we ended up with this mutant breaded sirloin that was revoltingly chewy), black beans (yay for cans), rice (which I never, ever screw up but I managed to space out & put equal parts rice and water the first time and burned it all to shit, then made it all soupy and half-done the second time...yuck!) and maduros (the plantains weren't as ripe as I like them, so I skipped that).
Saturday morning, J had to get up & go to work. When she got home around noon, we headed out for a tie dye party, our first outing with the couples' group we've joined. We drove up & down the street 4 times & never found the correct address, so we scrapped that plan and took Boot to the mall instead. It was new to us & we had a good time exploring all the stores, especially guy stores like Hollister and FootLocker. I ended up getting a new pair of running shoes for $30. They're nice and light and easy to slip into. They're also really pretty, light blue with yellow-green accents. We'd stopped on the way for lunch at Longhorn. I made the mistake of trying to order soup in a steak joint. J & Boot were very happy with their choices, boneless wings for him, steak salad (with watermelon in it!) for her. My salad was terrific, but the chili I was really looking forward to turned out to be super sweet, almost a dessert chili. Gross! So, I tried the loaded baked potato soup, which tasted of flour through and through. No way would I eat it. So, I was happy to stop at Johnny Rockets in the mall for malts. Boot chose a strawberry shake and an orange soda with lemon flavoring added, J had a peanut butter shake and I had a hot fudge malt. Not as good as Dick & Tom's, whose passing I still mourn, and not as good as Foy's Grill in Fairborn, but a damn sight better than Steak & Shake or McDonald's. After our shopping trip was complete, we went home and Boot & J watched t.v. for awhile while I read. Then, we had tacos and Pie actually emerged from his room. He'd slept the day away and then immersed himself in X-Box, sucking the last few days of summer for all they were worth. I remember when I was a little kid, summer meant long days at the pool followed by chasing fireflies, playing tunnel tag and hanging out downtown with my friends. To my kids, summer means the freedom to sleep and watch t.v. or play video games for hours. It makes me really sad.
Sunday morning, J gamely got up & went to church with me, even though I know she wanted some extra sleep since it was her first full day off since the 12th. I was really sorry, then, when they made the announcement that the ONA committee (which is supposed to be educating people on what declaring themselves an "Open and Affirming" church would mean...publicly declaring that the church is welcoming of people of all sexual orientations into the full life & ministry of the church) will be hosting a speaker on mental illness & the church. Now, I know that the ONA committee has been under pressure from people in the congregation to broaden the scope of its inquiry. That's the reason they chose to do this. They will also be hosting speakers on alcoholism and Alzheimer's. Perhaps you see the problem? I can only assume that they didn't. J was infuriated and her feelings were hurt badly. If you look carefully, you will see that one of these things is not like the others. Generally speaking, people suffering from mental illness would choose not to, if they could. It is largely considered a medical issue. Again generally speaking, people suffering from alcoholism would choose not to, if they could. It is largely considered a medical issue. Further, people suffering from Alzheimer's would choose not to, given the choice. It is definitely regarded as a medical issue. Treatments are prescribed for all three issues, we hope to find cures. Now, take homosexuality. Would I choose to be in love with a man, if I could? Well, no. Being in love with J was brought me more joy than any other love relationship I've been in, with men or women. Being gay does not cause suffering in my life, although prejudice against it certainly has. For someone suffering from mental illness, alcoholism or Alzheimer's, the condition itself causes suffering. It is not the prejudice in society (although that certainly doesn't help at all) that makes mental illness, alcoholism or Alzheimer's painful. Putting homosexuality in the same category as these is a major problem and the ONA committee just cannot see it. So, I am going to be forced to write a letter. Ugh.
After church, J was in a very down mood. We took Boot to Crocker Park and had coneys for lunch, then shopped around with him some more. I tell you, I will be thrilled when the day comes when I never have to step foot into any kind of sports store again. At least Dick's has kayaks and tents and other cool stuff like that to look at. Still, it gets tiresome to stand around in athletic shoe stores and jersey stores while Boot ogles every shoe and shirt for at least 10 minutes. I am not cut out for parenting a jock enthusiastically. I love him dearly, I want him to be who he is and I am waiting anxiously for the day that he no longer wants us to shop with him! J says it ain't gonna happen. Ai yi yi. After our long shopping trip, I was ready for a nap. I tried valiantly to watch t.v. with them, but ended up having to grab a nap. When I woke up, Boot had gone back to his dad's and it was time to go to the grocery. While we were there, we decided Marie Callender's pot pies sounded better than the ham & cheese stuffed French toast I had planned, so that's what we had.
I spent Monday shopping for back to school clothes and supplies for Pie. He started Tuesday and really likes it so far. It helps that his homework load is still light, which means plenty of play time. When the homework gets hot & heavy, I imagine his outlook may change. He seems to be doing really well without his meds, which just thrills me. I think he is still fidgety, but not to the extent that he can't function. Hurrah! May it continue. He likes all but one of his teachers, a long-term sub who is apparently very strict. Smart survival technique on her part! His other teachers, especially Mr. S, his Social Studies teacher, he says are funny. This is very good. Usually when Pie really likes someone, he tries to do well for them. I was impressed with the longitude and latitude homework he brought home yesterday. It is so much neater and more complete than his work last year. Not only that, but it was already done when he got home! I peeked at his spelling sentences, too. For "haughty," he had 2 sentences. One was something about the haughty kid who beat him on XBox Live. The second one was so cool. "The haughty chef stormed into the dining room to talk to the customer who complained about his world-famous Coquilles St. Jacques," he wrote. How the heck does my 12 year old know about Coquilles St. Jacques? In this sentence, he has really captured the essence of haughty. I love it!
Friday, August 31, 2007
Monday, August 20, 2007
Chaotic and Lazy
Our weekend turned out to be quite odd. We took Pie to his father's for a weekend visit. He was sweet and petty (not only wanting to be petted, but petting J, too) all the way. After we dropped him off, we made the huge mistake of stopping in Geneva-on-the-Lake for dinner. We both found it to be über-creepy and will never, ever return. I don't even plan to get off at the exit ever again. I don't want to go into detail ever. Suffice it to say that we felt the need to leave town before the sun set and we had a salt and lavender scrub when we got home. Sounds crazy, but it was very, very bad. After we'd showered, we went to the Cheesecake Factory and had comfort food (shepherd's pie for her, sautéed pork chops with mac & cheese for me) for dinner, having stopped after appetizers before. I don't know why I ate in that town. They always say not to eat or drink in places like that. I know this sounds all superstitious and weird, but I was really sorry I ate there & not just because the food sucked.
Then, Saturday morning about 3:30, J got a call from the security company saying there was a fire in the plant. She threw on some clothes & met the fire department there. The fire was miniscule, but it damaged the coolers and J consequently spent 12 hours dealing with the aftermath. I read and slept, mostly, but also took her glasses to her about 4:30 a.m. and lunch about 1. When she got home, we spent the afternoon in bed. I read and talked to my mom on the phone, she mostly slept. About 9:30, I ventured out for dinner from Max & Erma's (lemon herb halibut for her, ribs for me, banana cream pie to split) and we ate it in bed.
In the morning, she had to go in to the plant early. Since she wasn't back yet when I went to church, I went alone. There was lovely violin music and the announcement that I have completed the first step toward ordination. I haven't gotten the official word yet, but am told that the entire committee thought I did a great job at my interview. Woohoo! Once home, I snugged back into bed with J for about 45 minutes. Then, we went back to the plant, checking to make sure the coolers were still cooling. They were. J worked for a few more hours, while I read and did a writing exercise. We had some ice cream (silly with as chilly as all the rain has made it) at the Ben & Jerry's scoop shop, then went back to our bedroom haven again. We spent the afternoon immersed in our books. When Pie came home, he had eyes only for his 360, so we let him play after he'd eaten and again had our dinner in bed. I made pimiento cheese sandwiches (homemade p. cheese from Tillamook extra-sharp cheddar) and added chips and pickles to our plates. J went to sleep around 9:30 while I didn't hit the hay until 2 this morning. I was reading and filling in my new planner. Now, I must take her some lunch, then clean house. We have a cleaning lady coming tomorrow, so I have to make sure it's clean enough for her to clean. LOL! This really just entails doing some laundry and tidying our vanity, so it shouldn't take long. If not, I will hit the grocery, too.
Then, Saturday morning about 3:30, J got a call from the security company saying there was a fire in the plant. She threw on some clothes & met the fire department there. The fire was miniscule, but it damaged the coolers and J consequently spent 12 hours dealing with the aftermath. I read and slept, mostly, but also took her glasses to her about 4:30 a.m. and lunch about 1. When she got home, we spent the afternoon in bed. I read and talked to my mom on the phone, she mostly slept. About 9:30, I ventured out for dinner from Max & Erma's (lemon herb halibut for her, ribs for me, banana cream pie to split) and we ate it in bed.
In the morning, she had to go in to the plant early. Since she wasn't back yet when I went to church, I went alone. There was lovely violin music and the announcement that I have completed the first step toward ordination. I haven't gotten the official word yet, but am told that the entire committee thought I did a great job at my interview. Woohoo! Once home, I snugged back into bed with J for about 45 minutes. Then, we went back to the plant, checking to make sure the coolers were still cooling. They were. J worked for a few more hours, while I read and did a writing exercise. We had some ice cream (silly with as chilly as all the rain has made it) at the Ben & Jerry's scoop shop, then went back to our bedroom haven again. We spent the afternoon immersed in our books. When Pie came home, he had eyes only for his 360, so we let him play after he'd eaten and again had our dinner in bed. I made pimiento cheese sandwiches (homemade p. cheese from Tillamook extra-sharp cheddar) and added chips and pickles to our plates. J went to sleep around 9:30 while I didn't hit the hay until 2 this morning. I was reading and filling in my new planner. Now, I must take her some lunch, then clean house. We have a cleaning lady coming tomorrow, so I have to make sure it's clean enough for her to clean. LOL! This really just entails doing some laundry and tidying our vanity, so it shouldn't take long. If not, I will hit the grocery, too.
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
Birthday Revelry
Since J had to work on my birthday, I was on my own until evening. As she was leaving for work, J pulled the big black Audrey Hepburn hat I'd been ogling at Steinmart from the back of her car, my first gift for my 37th birthday. Before 8:30, I had gotten calls from the Miami Contingent, my uncle calling first, then my dad. I called my mom, too. So, it was off to a good start right away. Thinking I really deserved to have good fruit and cheese I love for my birthday breakfast, I took a detour by the lake to get to the grocery. As I walked into the grocery, I smelled heavenly fresh-baked bread. I realized that plain old English muffins would not do for the birthday girl and headed for the bakery. They had some beautiful mini ciabattas and I bought those, along with a gorgeous peach and some dill havarti. Ensconced in bed with a book, I enjoyed my breakfast of toasted ciabatta with plenty of butter, that perfect peach and several slices of cheese.
I took myself to the movies later. I'd hoped to go see "Shrek 3" or, preferably, the third "Pirates of the Caribbean" movie. My cousin Leah went to see that on her 18th birthday & it sounded like the perfect celebratory movie. But, no, our local cinema won't keep movies around long enough to actually see them (phooey on Regal!) so I ended up settling for "Ratatouille," which was cute, but nothing spectacular. Still, just being at the movies was a wonderful time. After the movie, I went out into the sunlight, blinking and astonished not to be in an animated version of Paris. I picked up lunch at Bob Evans, chicken salad for me and a pot roast sandwich for J. We ate in her office, then I headed out to get my brows waxed. A facial would have been better, I suppose, but I wasn't in the mood to be at Aveda that long.
I spent the rest of the afternoon working on my life list, a list of things I want to do at some point in my life. It ranges from the large (build our dream house) to the small (color in coloring books), the adventurous (go kayaking) to the fairly mundane (make pie crust from scratch). I try to update it every year on my birthday. When J got home, she had a large Hello Kitty bag full of gifts for me. There were fun hair scrunchies that looked Tinkerbell-ish, a CD walkman & audio book called "Snow Flower and the Secret Fan" (I have the idea that if I have books I can only listen to when I'm walking, I will get out and do it more...except it's been hellishly hot here lately...I did get one great walk by the lake in, so far, though), a SARK book, a book of kiss coupons, a book of love quotes and a stack of my favorite magazines. It was a delightful surprise, as I had assumed the hat was my only gift. It would have done just fine, too. I also got a sandalwood mala from my mom & Graham. I've been wanting one for a long time, but have never broken down and gotten one for myself.
We changed clothes and headed out to dinner at The Melting Pot. I'd had a terrific birthday dinner at the one in Nashville a few years before and I had every reason to expect the same this time. I wasn't disappointed. Well, maybe a teensy bit because there was no candle on the cheesecake slice, but I got birthday cards from them, so that was nice. I feel a little birthday cake deprived, though...or wish-deprived, perhaps. Our waiter wasn't that great. Luckily, the manager was mostly the one who waited on us and he was fabulous. We tried a slightly different cheese fondue for our first course, one with an Asian flavor imparted by sake in place of kirsch. It was delicious. Then, we had Asian-themed salads with Mandarin oranges and almonds. For our main course, we chose the coq au vin broth. J added a lobster tail and we were both very happy. My favorite part of the main course was chicken with a curry dipping sauce. Dessert was dark chocolate fondue with a little Chambord added for a raspberry splash. We were fat as piggies when we left, with big grins on our faces. It was a delightful day to turn 37!
I took myself to the movies later. I'd hoped to go see "Shrek 3" or, preferably, the third "Pirates of the Caribbean" movie. My cousin Leah went to see that on her 18th birthday & it sounded like the perfect celebratory movie. But, no, our local cinema won't keep movies around long enough to actually see them (phooey on Regal!) so I ended up settling for "Ratatouille," which was cute, but nothing spectacular. Still, just being at the movies was a wonderful time. After the movie, I went out into the sunlight, blinking and astonished not to be in an animated version of Paris. I picked up lunch at Bob Evans, chicken salad for me and a pot roast sandwich for J. We ate in her office, then I headed out to get my brows waxed. A facial would have been better, I suppose, but I wasn't in the mood to be at Aveda that long.
I spent the rest of the afternoon working on my life list, a list of things I want to do at some point in my life. It ranges from the large (build our dream house) to the small (color in coloring books), the adventurous (go kayaking) to the fairly mundane (make pie crust from scratch). I try to update it every year on my birthday. When J got home, she had a large Hello Kitty bag full of gifts for me. There were fun hair scrunchies that looked Tinkerbell-ish, a CD walkman & audio book called "Snow Flower and the Secret Fan" (I have the idea that if I have books I can only listen to when I'm walking, I will get out and do it more...except it's been hellishly hot here lately...I did get one great walk by the lake in, so far, though), a SARK book, a book of kiss coupons, a book of love quotes and a stack of my favorite magazines. It was a delightful surprise, as I had assumed the hat was my only gift. It would have done just fine, too. I also got a sandalwood mala from my mom & Graham. I've been wanting one for a long time, but have never broken down and gotten one for myself.
We changed clothes and headed out to dinner at The Melting Pot. I'd had a terrific birthday dinner at the one in Nashville a few years before and I had every reason to expect the same this time. I wasn't disappointed. Well, maybe a teensy bit because there was no candle on the cheesecake slice, but I got birthday cards from them, so that was nice. I feel a little birthday cake deprived, though...or wish-deprived, perhaps. Our waiter wasn't that great. Luckily, the manager was mostly the one who waited on us and he was fabulous. We tried a slightly different cheese fondue for our first course, one with an Asian flavor imparted by sake in place of kirsch. It was delicious. Then, we had Asian-themed salads with Mandarin oranges and almonds. For our main course, we chose the coq au vin broth. J added a lobster tail and we were both very happy. My favorite part of the main course was chicken with a curry dipping sauce. Dessert was dark chocolate fondue with a little Chambord added for a raspberry splash. We were fat as piggies when we left, with big grins on our faces. It was a delightful day to turn 37!
Indians of All Sorts
Haven't been very good about keeping up, so I'll go back to the weekend before my birthday, July 13-15. J's plant decided that, for their summer picnic, they'd like to go see the Cleveland Indians play. We all got tickets to the game and also for a BBQ chicken and hot dog dinner beforehand. It was fun to attend the game, even for non-sports fans like me. I was very excited about the fireworks afterward, but then realized I needed to register for a church event before midnight! So, we watched the fireworks over the top of the stadium as we walked toward the Rapid. We'd chosen to ride public transportation in rather than hassling with parking and traffic after the game. I think it was a smart idea, but it really stressed J out, so we probably won't be doing that again. We made it home with 13 minutes to spare, thank goodness!
We lazed in bed quite late Saturday, watching movies, reading, dozing. When we finally roused ourselves, we made our way across town to Whole Foods, our first visit to an Ohio location. Why, oh, why can't it be on our side of town? We had a blast. As we began to head for home, we saw a bunch of Orthodox Jews walking to temple, a group of young African-American women hanging out together, a WASP-y older guy on his bike. It was really nice to see such diversity. We don't see nearly enough of it, although there are a lot of Indian and Muslim folks on our side of town, which is nice diversity, too.
We stopped in Lakewood on the way home, hoping to finally have some good Indian food. It wasn't as good as Ajanta India, but it was very good and the atmosphere was pleasant. It was also crawling with folks from the LGBT community, a group of lesbian feminists discussing politics, a group of gay men discussing real estate. It was fun.
In the morning, we went to church and then had a wonderful brunch on the patio at the Cheesecake Factory. After brunch, I went with J to the plant so she could do a little extra work. I took paper and pen and began to work on a novel. I've never thought I would write a novel, but this trio of sisters started rattling around in my head a couple of years ago, along with the bed & breakfast 2 of them run. So, I decided to let them out to play, not really trying to write a novel, just writing little vignettes. I've been having a grand time getting to know them & their town. After J was finished with her work, we went to a big juried craft show. It was really great! I ran into some blacksmiths who know my mom and bought a gorgeous silver clay pendant that says "Play" on it & has a picture of trees. I've worn it nearly every day since. Once home, we grilled our dinner, a couple of espresso-rubbed steaks (that weren't very good), at the pool.
We lazed in bed quite late Saturday, watching movies, reading, dozing. When we finally roused ourselves, we made our way across town to Whole Foods, our first visit to an Ohio location. Why, oh, why can't it be on our side of town? We had a blast. As we began to head for home, we saw a bunch of Orthodox Jews walking to temple, a group of young African-American women hanging out together, a WASP-y older guy on his bike. It was really nice to see such diversity. We don't see nearly enough of it, although there are a lot of Indian and Muslim folks on our side of town, which is nice diversity, too.
We stopped in Lakewood on the way home, hoping to finally have some good Indian food. It wasn't as good as Ajanta India, but it was very good and the atmosphere was pleasant. It was also crawling with folks from the LGBT community, a group of lesbian feminists discussing politics, a group of gay men discussing real estate. It was fun.
In the morning, we went to church and then had a wonderful brunch on the patio at the Cheesecake Factory. After brunch, I went with J to the plant so she could do a little extra work. I took paper and pen and began to work on a novel. I've never thought I would write a novel, but this trio of sisters started rattling around in my head a couple of years ago, along with the bed & breakfast 2 of them run. So, I decided to let them out to play, not really trying to write a novel, just writing little vignettes. I've been having a grand time getting to know them & their town. After J was finished with her work, we went to a big juried craft show. It was really great! I ran into some blacksmiths who know my mom and bought a gorgeous silver clay pendant that says "Play" on it & has a picture of trees. I've worn it nearly every day since. Once home, we grilled our dinner, a couple of espresso-rubbed steaks (that weren't very good), at the pool.
Monday, July 16, 2007
Pre-Court Stress
The weekend after the 4th wasn't much fun at all. Since J's oh-so-delightful ex is again (for the third time) suing for custody of the boys and court was Monday, that was the main focus of the weekend. Friday afternoon, I did get to relax a bit, though. Pie and I baked a cocoa cake from Gourmet magazine, his first from scratch. He was delighted with it and with the "gorilla casserole" I made for dinner. He just had time to eat before Dark Man picked him up for summer visitation. J let him go a day early, for some reason. It turned out to be a good thing, though, because we wouldn't have had much time to enjoy him Saturday anyway. Knowing we'd be worn out before the court thing was over, we hit the sack a little after 7 Friday night. Wow, we are such wild and out-of-control lesbians! It almost hurts my feelings to go to bed so early since I am a night owl, but we knew we'd need the extra sleep.
We worked on court crap all day Saturday, organizing our paperwork into foldersd & tabbing it for easy reference in court. Ugh! I made some cranberry orange scones to get us through and J heated up gorilla casserole for our lunch. Finally, we took a break to go shopping for court clothes and grab some dinner. Of course, we have perfectly fine clothes we could wear in court, but new clothes made it more appealing. Bearable? I found this stunning black and white halter dress that looks like something Grace Kelly would have worn. J found me a classic black and white cardigan to go with it. I wanted to find some cute sandals with kitten heels, but no luck in a size 11. She found a pink watch she loves. There's this fabulous black big-brimmed hat that I am dying to go back and get. I couldn't wear it in court, but it looks damn fine on me and is perfect for the outfit. I may get it yet.
We were the last patrons at Bovalino's that night, enjoying gnocchi and spaghetti with meatballs on the patio. It's very soothing to me to be outside at night and if I'm also eating good pasta and salad with amazing garlic dressing, so much the better. Then, we headed home and pored over court materials until 3 a.m. Ugh! We took a brief sleep and church break, then looked over the papers more. Finally, we headed for the Dayton area, stopping for a mediocre dinner at Logan's Roadhouse. J loved her steak, but my open-face roast beef was not very good and I am terribly disappointed that they no longer serve fried green tomatoes. They do have awfully good sweet tea, though, and I am always happy when I can get good sweet tea without having to make room in my fridge for the pitcher.
We got a too-brief visit in with my grandies before having to go to bed and look over the court crap one last time. I will be so glad to have this ridiculousness over with for good. That I don't expect until Pie is 18. 5 and a half years. Not that I'm counting. We had to leave by 7 in order to meet with our attorney before court. He seemed utterly confident. Once J saw him in action in the courtroom, she felt more confident than she had. I never made it into the courtroom. The judge had interviewed the kids again in his chambers & had also talked to the ad litem. J's ex-MIL testified & our dear pastor did, too. I was so glad to have him there, if only for moral support. Once they'd been called, we were done. They had only allotted us a half day & the hearing was yet again continued. Thank goodness not until October or something like that and especially thank goodness not for my birthday!!! I was positive that would be the day, but it's actually Thursday & not tomorrow.
J's ex-MIL's whole case was that her ex is supposedly a good father & the kids love him. J said, "Well, they love candy, too, but that doesn't mean I'm going to let them eat it all the time!" She also lied on the stand, saying that J flipped her ex off when he came to get the kids and that we never gave him any info about the kids' counselor. She couldn't talk smack about me at all because it was all classified as hearsay since she has never met me. One of her big charges is that there's nowhere here for the kids to throw a ball or ride their bikes & that they're "trapped in an upstairs apartment all day long." Bull. For one thing, there is a really cool mall within half a mile to which they can ride their bikes to play giant chess, go to the movies, shop and hang out with other kids. For another, we have a sand volleyball court, a racquetball court, a basketball court, tennis courts and a pool for ball-playing, not to mention the big grassy areas throughout the complex. Not only that, but we are 10 minutes from the lake and there are scads of parks in town. Harrumph.
The weirdest thing we found out wasn't that J's ex's family had been the ones to pay all the child support he's come up with in the last 4 years (less than $5,000 for both boys) because we kind of suspected that. Can you imagine paying your 45 year old son's child support for him because he isn't working & lives in your basement??? It wasn't even the fact that he couldn't even be bothered to register Boot for school when he moved there in February and had her do it. She is 80 & should be through her child-rearing obligations, but nope. Not for her because her son is a lazy loser who's never taken responsibility for a damn thing in his life as far as I can tell. No, the weirdest thing is that the boys' great-grandma, who had lived with her ex & his mom, has been dead for three years! This is weird because the boys have been telling us up until July 4th not only that Grandma Lyon is alive & well & eating celery, but they've been telling us details of visits to her nursing home. I'm sorry, there is just something very sick about lying consistently for 3 years about your dead great-grandmother. Why lie, anyway? I feel quite sure that I will never be able to trust either boy again. Very disconcerting & creepy to know that they are so comfortable with and acclimated to lying. This is what he's done to them.
After court, we tried to have dinner at Mela in Springfield. Unfortunately, the food and service were both so abysmal that we couldn't eat it. At all. So, we gave up on that and decided to get on the road before trying to have lunch again. We did find a decent place, an Amish restaurant close to Mansfield. It was good to get home that night. I am not looking forward to court on Thursday, but I have my birthday to look forward to before that and a weekend in Columbus after.
We worked on court crap all day Saturday, organizing our paperwork into foldersd & tabbing it for easy reference in court. Ugh! I made some cranberry orange scones to get us through and J heated up gorilla casserole for our lunch. Finally, we took a break to go shopping for court clothes and grab some dinner. Of course, we have perfectly fine clothes we could wear in court, but new clothes made it more appealing. Bearable? I found this stunning black and white halter dress that looks like something Grace Kelly would have worn. J found me a classic black and white cardigan to go with it. I wanted to find some cute sandals with kitten heels, but no luck in a size 11. She found a pink watch she loves. There's this fabulous black big-brimmed hat that I am dying to go back and get. I couldn't wear it in court, but it looks damn fine on me and is perfect for the outfit. I may get it yet.
We were the last patrons at Bovalino's that night, enjoying gnocchi and spaghetti with meatballs on the patio. It's very soothing to me to be outside at night and if I'm also eating good pasta and salad with amazing garlic dressing, so much the better. Then, we headed home and pored over court materials until 3 a.m. Ugh! We took a brief sleep and church break, then looked over the papers more. Finally, we headed for the Dayton area, stopping for a mediocre dinner at Logan's Roadhouse. J loved her steak, but my open-face roast beef was not very good and I am terribly disappointed that they no longer serve fried green tomatoes. They do have awfully good sweet tea, though, and I am always happy when I can get good sweet tea without having to make room in my fridge for the pitcher.
We got a too-brief visit in with my grandies before having to go to bed and look over the court crap one last time. I will be so glad to have this ridiculousness over with for good. That I don't expect until Pie is 18. 5 and a half years. Not that I'm counting. We had to leave by 7 in order to meet with our attorney before court. He seemed utterly confident. Once J saw him in action in the courtroom, she felt more confident than she had. I never made it into the courtroom. The judge had interviewed the kids again in his chambers & had also talked to the ad litem. J's ex-MIL testified & our dear pastor did, too. I was so glad to have him there, if only for moral support. Once they'd been called, we were done. They had only allotted us a half day & the hearing was yet again continued. Thank goodness not until October or something like that and especially thank goodness not for my birthday!!! I was positive that would be the day, but it's actually Thursday & not tomorrow.
J's ex-MIL's whole case was that her ex is supposedly a good father & the kids love him. J said, "Well, they love candy, too, but that doesn't mean I'm going to let them eat it all the time!" She also lied on the stand, saying that J flipped her ex off when he came to get the kids and that we never gave him any info about the kids' counselor. She couldn't talk smack about me at all because it was all classified as hearsay since she has never met me. One of her big charges is that there's nowhere here for the kids to throw a ball or ride their bikes & that they're "trapped in an upstairs apartment all day long." Bull. For one thing, there is a really cool mall within half a mile to which they can ride their bikes to play giant chess, go to the movies, shop and hang out with other kids. For another, we have a sand volleyball court, a racquetball court, a basketball court, tennis courts and a pool for ball-playing, not to mention the big grassy areas throughout the complex. Not only that, but we are 10 minutes from the lake and there are scads of parks in town. Harrumph.
The weirdest thing we found out wasn't that J's ex's family had been the ones to pay all the child support he's come up with in the last 4 years (less than $5,000 for both boys) because we kind of suspected that. Can you imagine paying your 45 year old son's child support for him because he isn't working & lives in your basement??? It wasn't even the fact that he couldn't even be bothered to register Boot for school when he moved there in February and had her do it. She is 80 & should be through her child-rearing obligations, but nope. Not for her because her son is a lazy loser who's never taken responsibility for a damn thing in his life as far as I can tell. No, the weirdest thing is that the boys' great-grandma, who had lived with her ex & his mom, has been dead for three years! This is weird because the boys have been telling us up until July 4th not only that Grandma Lyon is alive & well & eating celery, but they've been telling us details of visits to her nursing home. I'm sorry, there is just something very sick about lying consistently for 3 years about your dead great-grandmother. Why lie, anyway? I feel quite sure that I will never be able to trust either boy again. Very disconcerting & creepy to know that they are so comfortable with and acclimated to lying. This is what he's done to them.
After court, we tried to have dinner at Mela in Springfield. Unfortunately, the food and service were both so abysmal that we couldn't eat it. At all. So, we gave up on that and decided to get on the road before trying to have lunch again. We did find a decent place, an Amish restaurant close to Mansfield. It was good to get home that night. I am not looking forward to court on Thursday, but I have my birthday to look forward to before that and a weekend in Columbus after.
A Splashy 4th
We had visitation with Boot on the 4th from 9 to 9, so we decided to make the most of it by visiting with him there. When J got off work Tuesday night, we packed up the car (primarily with swimsuits & towels) and headed to Erie. We checked into our hotel & took the shuttle to Splash Lagoon, where we played until closing time. Then, we had dinner & played NTN trivia at Damon's before heading back to the hotel to rest up for Wednesday.
J picked Boot up from his dad's and they joined me in the breakfast room of the hotel. We got Pie moving pretty easily and were at the waterpark just after opening. It wasn't very crowded. I took two books with me, one for dry reading and one for in the water. I keep a stash of pool books, paperbacks I pick up at thrift stores & yard sales & save for reading at/in pools. James Patterson's Cross was my dry book. It's great fun. My pool book was a Carolyn Hart mystery, Southern Ghost. I spent most of the day in one or another of the three "hot tubs"...really a range from cool to lukewarm to warm. J joined me much of the time and we did the lazy river, too. Of course, she did some slides with the boys, too. No wonder her suits are always wearing out so quickly!
We left the water park and headed for a Jelly Belly/fireworks/weapons store. I kid you not. While it may seem improbable that a weapons store would also sell chocolates and Jelly Belly jellybeans, this one does. J & I both got sweets, Boot got some firecrackers and Pie chose 2 display Ninja stars...the kind that look cool but aren't sharp. Then, we had dinner at Eat 'N' Park before we had to take Boot home. We got to see some fireworks on the way home, but it just isn't the same as going to a display at Gaunt Park. Oh well, we did see some good ones at John & Nola's.
J picked Boot up from his dad's and they joined me in the breakfast room of the hotel. We got Pie moving pretty easily and were at the waterpark just after opening. It wasn't very crowded. I took two books with me, one for dry reading and one for in the water. I keep a stash of pool books, paperbacks I pick up at thrift stores & yard sales & save for reading at/in pools. James Patterson's Cross was my dry book. It's great fun. My pool book was a Carolyn Hart mystery, Southern Ghost. I spent most of the day in one or another of the three "hot tubs"...really a range from cool to lukewarm to warm. J joined me much of the time and we did the lazy river, too. Of course, she did some slides with the boys, too. No wonder her suits are always wearing out so quickly!
We left the water park and headed for a Jelly Belly/fireworks/weapons store. I kid you not. While it may seem improbable that a weapons store would also sell chocolates and Jelly Belly jellybeans, this one does. J & I both got sweets, Boot got some firecrackers and Pie chose 2 display Ninja stars...the kind that look cool but aren't sharp. Then, we had dinner at Eat 'N' Park before we had to take Boot home. We got to see some fireworks on the way home, but it just isn't the same as going to a display at Gaunt Park. Oh well, we did see some good ones at John & Nola's.
Aunties & Uncles & Cousins, Oh My!
The last weekend of June/first weekend of July was a family-filled one! Friday night was pretty quiet, with a trip to Trader Joe's for the grown folks and walking around Crocker Park for the boys. Saturday morning, J & Boot went shopping so Boot could find his usual shirt to purchase while here for the weekend. I spent the morning reading & whipping up some bagel chip dip to take to John & Nola's annual Canada Day/4th of July bash. It takes us a good 3 hours to get to their place, so we set out a little after noon, playing the radio game much of the way down. Boot was a delight and Pie was fine, too, until he found out it was a 3-hour drive and thought we were only going to stay 45 minutes. Not sure why he thought that, but he howled, "We're going six hours for a 45-minute party???" He felt better when assured we would stay much longer than that & that there would be cheeseburgers and fireworks.
Both boys seemed to have a really good time at the party, although they were mightily cranky with one another! At one point, J made Boot go to the car with her to calm down because he was so furious with Pie & was threatening to hit him. Pie kept on playing with the other kids, in the creek, with the dogs and so forth. Boot and J both dozed off in the car and Boot couldn't be woken until after the fireworks! He slept right through 'em! I woke J up for the pony trick show.
J & I spent our time (when she wasn't napping) visiting with relatives and with Nola's best friend, who was heavily pregnant, much to our surprise! Last time we'd seen her, she was in the throes of wedding prep and apparently, she got pregnant on their wedding night. They are very excited & I can't wait to see the bambino next time we go down. John was the grillmaster, decked out in a straw cowboy hat & Canadian flag muscle shirt showing off his latest tattoos. We found Nola in the kitchen mixing up sangria. She asked if we were going to have sangria & said she couldn't have any. She is pregnant again, expecting #2 in the next generation sometime in February! Yippee!!! I love NG #1 and hope maybe we'll get a girl to complement him this time.
Cousin #2 & his wife were there, just back from an R&R trip to Jamaica with 8 of their buddies. Our favorite barista wasn't there because his wife had to have surgery, so we bid them hello through cousin #2. My uncle Vic was there, with guitar & harmonica, although we had to miss the music in order to get home at a reasonable hour to allow for church in the morning. Drat! I always like to hear Vic sing the blues. We need to get over to Ann Arbor to visit them & check out their new restaurant. Nyoko was back home, working her usual 22-hour day getting the restaurant on its feet. I hear from my mom that the food & presentation are stellar. My auntie Jeanie was down from Vermont. She'd been visiting my grandies. Boot was waiting on her, taking her cake and Cokes throughout the early part of the party. He is so considerate, when he's being considerate, which is most of the time these days. For example, I was headed toward the trash can with full hands the other weekend. Boot noticed and opened the trash can for me without a word. That is so nice. It shows he is paying attention to the needs of other people.
Jazzbo & Ann were there with both Goldens in tow. Of course, Starr immediately headed for the creek and was soaking wet & filthy within 20 minutes of their arrival. Jazzbo & Ann were both pretty aggravated, but she cleaned up nicely even without benefit of a hose. I wish we'd been able to pitch our tent overnight with them. Maybe next year. Last year, the skies opened up and thunder rolled and we all slept inside! Good thing John & Nova have plenty of space. Their place is perfect for family get-togethers. I hope we'll be able to go there for Thanksgiving this year. They have taken over the mantle since our "second grandma" moved. J & I had planned to, but with this little apartment, that sure won't work.
Poor Xavier, my sweet wolfie, was not allowed out because he'd been bullying the other dogs at the start of the party. His handsome head was to be seen in the windows, looking out with a left-out look on his face. He looked great with his summer haircut.
We had a delightful visit, if not long enough, and the fireworks were very cool. We hit the road about 10, J's allergies in full swing. She and Pie were covered in chigger bites, too, poor things.
Sunday morning, J & I went to church. Finally, we got to join. They'd been waiting until they had more than just a couple new members. A couple about our age joined, with their son and daughter. I think their daughter's in high school & their son in 8th grade. Also, an older woman and the church organist and her son. We were invited out to lunch by 2 different people, but declined because we had plans already.
What fun we had, too! We went home, packed up some burgers & dogs and headed for the pool with the boys. We spent the afternoon swimming, munching lunch and enjoying the sun. Too soon, it was time for Boot to be picked up and us to get presentable for Jeanie's arrival. Once she arrived, we took her out to dinner at Aladdin's. Pie wanted nothing to do with it, so he got a cheeseburger instead. Jeanie loved Crocker Park and our complex, saying it's like we live at Disney.
In the morning, J had to go to work, but Jeanie and I were free to go for beignets & coffee at Petite de Vie. We sat outside with our breakfast & made plans to take my mommy to Disney one of these days. We went shopping & Jeanie bought me & J some monkey head key covers, very cute & very Jeanie. We each got a pair of Crocs, too. They are so comfortable! We made some paper cranes once we got back to the apartment. I don't think I could do it again, but at least I got to make Boot the one I'd promised him. Jeanie helped me get the slipcover on the loveseat and then we had lunch. We spent the afternoon lounging with our books at the pool while Pie & his friend played in the water. Since J had to go out to Blake's with one of the VPs who was in town, I took Jeanie to The Winking Lizard for dinner. She requested American food & that's a great place to get it. We sat on the patio & enjoyed each other's company. I sure am lucky to have the relatives I have. Leah & Jeanie are coming back at the end of August, which will be really cool. It's been 2 years since I've seen my youngest (and only girl) cousin! Too long! She's 18 now & I can hardly believe it! Although Jeanie had to leave for home Tuesday morning, I can look forward to seeing her often since she's moving back to Ohio. I expect I'll get to see more of the kids, too. One of these days, I want to get down to Savannah to visit them at school.
Both boys seemed to have a really good time at the party, although they were mightily cranky with one another! At one point, J made Boot go to the car with her to calm down because he was so furious with Pie & was threatening to hit him. Pie kept on playing with the other kids, in the creek, with the dogs and so forth. Boot and J both dozed off in the car and Boot couldn't be woken until after the fireworks! He slept right through 'em! I woke J up for the pony trick show.
J & I spent our time (when she wasn't napping) visiting with relatives and with Nola's best friend, who was heavily pregnant, much to our surprise! Last time we'd seen her, she was in the throes of wedding prep and apparently, she got pregnant on their wedding night. They are very excited & I can't wait to see the bambino next time we go down. John was the grillmaster, decked out in a straw cowboy hat & Canadian flag muscle shirt showing off his latest tattoos. We found Nola in the kitchen mixing up sangria. She asked if we were going to have sangria & said she couldn't have any. She is pregnant again, expecting #2 in the next generation sometime in February! Yippee!!! I love NG #1 and hope maybe we'll get a girl to complement him this time.
Cousin #2 & his wife were there, just back from an R&R trip to Jamaica with 8 of their buddies. Our favorite barista wasn't there because his wife had to have surgery, so we bid them hello through cousin #2. My uncle Vic was there, with guitar & harmonica, although we had to miss the music in order to get home at a reasonable hour to allow for church in the morning. Drat! I always like to hear Vic sing the blues. We need to get over to Ann Arbor to visit them & check out their new restaurant. Nyoko was back home, working her usual 22-hour day getting the restaurant on its feet. I hear from my mom that the food & presentation are stellar. My auntie Jeanie was down from Vermont. She'd been visiting my grandies. Boot was waiting on her, taking her cake and Cokes throughout the early part of the party. He is so considerate, when he's being considerate, which is most of the time these days. For example, I was headed toward the trash can with full hands the other weekend. Boot noticed and opened the trash can for me without a word. That is so nice. It shows he is paying attention to the needs of other people.
Jazzbo & Ann were there with both Goldens in tow. Of course, Starr immediately headed for the creek and was soaking wet & filthy within 20 minutes of their arrival. Jazzbo & Ann were both pretty aggravated, but she cleaned up nicely even without benefit of a hose. I wish we'd been able to pitch our tent overnight with them. Maybe next year. Last year, the skies opened up and thunder rolled and we all slept inside! Good thing John & Nova have plenty of space. Their place is perfect for family get-togethers. I hope we'll be able to go there for Thanksgiving this year. They have taken over the mantle since our "second grandma" moved. J & I had planned to, but with this little apartment, that sure won't work.
Poor Xavier, my sweet wolfie, was not allowed out because he'd been bullying the other dogs at the start of the party. His handsome head was to be seen in the windows, looking out with a left-out look on his face. He looked great with his summer haircut.
We had a delightful visit, if not long enough, and the fireworks were very cool. We hit the road about 10, J's allergies in full swing. She and Pie were covered in chigger bites, too, poor things.
Sunday morning, J & I went to church. Finally, we got to join. They'd been waiting until they had more than just a couple new members. A couple about our age joined, with their son and daughter. I think their daughter's in high school & their son in 8th grade. Also, an older woman and the church organist and her son. We were invited out to lunch by 2 different people, but declined because we had plans already.
What fun we had, too! We went home, packed up some burgers & dogs and headed for the pool with the boys. We spent the afternoon swimming, munching lunch and enjoying the sun. Too soon, it was time for Boot to be picked up and us to get presentable for Jeanie's arrival. Once she arrived, we took her out to dinner at Aladdin's. Pie wanted nothing to do with it, so he got a cheeseburger instead. Jeanie loved Crocker Park and our complex, saying it's like we live at Disney.
In the morning, J had to go to work, but Jeanie and I were free to go for beignets & coffee at Petite de Vie. We sat outside with our breakfast & made plans to take my mommy to Disney one of these days. We went shopping & Jeanie bought me & J some monkey head key covers, very cute & very Jeanie. We each got a pair of Crocs, too. They are so comfortable! We made some paper cranes once we got back to the apartment. I don't think I could do it again, but at least I got to make Boot the one I'd promised him. Jeanie helped me get the slipcover on the loveseat and then we had lunch. We spent the afternoon lounging with our books at the pool while Pie & his friend played in the water. Since J had to go out to Blake's with one of the VPs who was in town, I took Jeanie to The Winking Lizard for dinner. She requested American food & that's a great place to get it. We sat on the patio & enjoyed each other's company. I sure am lucky to have the relatives I have. Leah & Jeanie are coming back at the end of August, which will be really cool. It's been 2 years since I've seen my youngest (and only girl) cousin! Too long! She's 18 now & I can hardly believe it! Although Jeanie had to leave for home Tuesday morning, I can look forward to seeing her often since she's moving back to Ohio. I expect I'll get to see more of the kids, too. One of these days, I want to get down to Savannah to visit them at school.
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